Wednesday, September 19, 2007

"I wonder if they can check the other stores?"

Shopping with my mom is quite the chore, and almost always an all-day adventure. Today was no exception. Usually I get cranky with her on her shopping sprees, but today, I simply observed her quirky (and cute) shopping habits:

1. When entering a store, always look for signs on top of the clothing racks that indicate everything on it is at least 60% off. Once located, walk (or sprint) as fast as you can to said rack.

2. To get a question answered, nonchalantly walk past a sales associate and say aloud, "I wonder if these are on sale; I wonder how much this is?" or something to that extent. It is much more effective than actually getting the associate's attention first.

3. Try on every piece of clothing that is on sale, regardless of whether or not you actually like it. Today, she ripped apart a coat on the hanger (it's not heavy enough, what an ugly color), but tried it on anyway, and then gave a disgusted look when it didn't magically change into something that she loved after she put it on.

4. Don't be afraid to try on clothes ranging from the junior section to the petite section, to the misses section, no matter what age you are. She found a couple of "racy" shirts and dresses today (think really low cut). Don't worry, I gave her enough grief about it, that she will be searching for a camisole: "Mom, I think you have officially reached your mid-life crisis." haha. My question of the day: "Can you wear that to church?"

5. Always check out stores with weird names because "you never know what you will find." Today's store: Tuesday Morning. It was actually a pretty neat place. It reminded me of the home and decor branch of TJ Maxx. There were some pretty awesome silverware sets, and sheets there at a super discounted price! Mom knows best!

6. Pronounce brand names such as Gucci (pronounced Goo-see) or Dolce and Gabbana (Dull-chee and Cabana) incorrectly. It's just funny.

7. When trying to locate a brand name in the store, ramble off letters like "C I E or E C I or C E I or something" and hope the store clerk can help you find it. Today, she was looking for E C I, but the sales clerk found, C I A instead. We eventually found E C I on our own. I don't even know why she was looking for it.

8. Peruse the shoe section of the same store twice while you are there. You never know when they will add more shoes.

9. In order to save time, try on clothes without going to the dressing room. Nothing perverted or weird, just try them on over the clothes you are already wearing. We found a super cute dress today after mom had been in the dressing room for awhile, so she just tried on the brown and white sleeveless dress over her bright pink t-shirt, and let her white capris stick out from under the hem of the dress. She then said, "What do you think? Just ignore the pink!" As you can imagine, that was pretty hard to do, so Blake and I handed her a brown shrug sweater to go over top of it (the same as what the mannequin was wearing). To complete the outfit, she rolled up her pant legs, and then tried on the display shoes. She bought the dress.

10. Spend at least three hours in one store. How else do you think she gets all of the above accomplished?

My biggest lesson of the day: Don't listen to her when she claims she will "stay right here." Not only does she NOT stay right there, but since she is so short, you can't find her when she roams. She is shorter than the clothing racks. Our most brilliant idea as kids when shopping with mom was to put those silly bells on her purse. We couldn't see her, but at least we could hear her!

The adorable shopper helping Jennifer's house feel like a home last June.


Jennifer said...

Lurve it!

Jennifer said...

One more thing: within earshot of a sales associate, say, "Maybe I should ask them if this on sale. You think I should ask them if this is on sale? Maybe I should ask them..."

Lola said...

OK, that was hysterical (esp. #2)!! It was almost like I was there myself as I was reading it! Good thing Jesso asked to see "BAY-bee! Bay-BEEEEEE!" for the umpteen millionth time today, or I wouldn't have seen this post :)

michelle said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
michelle said...

your mom is so cute! =D

Richelle Kuboushek said...

Your mama sounds like a total blast! :o) I LOVE this entry! LOL!